Addiction
by The Grey Fox
Summary: What does Kevin experience when he absorbs energy? Ben decides to ask, and ends up getting the osmosian's life story. Rated for self-harm, mentions of drug use and suicide, and Kevin's language. Takes place after "Ultimate Alien": "Absolute Power". Is AU after "Absolute Power: Part 1". Mentions of Gwevin.
1. Chapter 1

**A/N: Welp, here is my first Ben 10 fanfiction. I'm actually rather proud of it.**

**This takes place about four months after the events of "Absolute Power" of the first season in ****Ultimate Alien****. In this story, the end of Part 2 is a little different, so it is AU. **

**Warnings: Self-harming and mentions of drug use and suicide. Includes a few swear words, because Kevin is a potty-mouth.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own ****Ben**** 10:**** anything. Please don't sue me, I have no money.**

**EDITED: 2/26/15: Moved the word 'a' from before the '…' to after it.**

**Addiction**

_**Chapter One**_

It was 10:42 on a quiet Saturday night. In the living room of the Tennyson's house (the Benjamin division), two teens sat quietly on the couch. The younger one, taking up two of the furniture's three cushions, was staring blankly at the TV screen, watching but not really paying attention to the nature documentary playing. The older one was sitting under the only other light source in the room: a small floor lamp, which illuminated the highly technical-looking manual in his lap. One leg was bent on the seat, the foot resting on the other thigh. Every once in a while, he nods or frowns in concentration, completely absorbed in the book.

They had been like this for well over an hour, and Ben still couldn't believe Kevin was actually _reading _something.

The documentary ends, and Ben turns off the TV. Silence fills the room, but Kevin doesn't seem to notice. Ben doesn't make to get up, and instead sits there, thinking. It had been several months since the team 'cured' Kevin at the abandoned military base, and there were more than a few things Ben was wondering about Kevin, or osmosians in general.

He heard from Kevin, as well as experiencing it first-hand, that the absorption of energy causes mental instability in osmosians, and he wonders how it feels. Was Kevin aware that what he was doing was wrong, and just couldn't stop himself, or did he simply not care? He wonders if it's the energy itself that causes insanity, or if it is the feeling of power. He wonders if Kevin ever misses the power energy gave him. He wonders if Kevin ever feels tempted, in a fight, to just plug into an electrical socket to give himself an edge. He wonders why Kevin's never bothered to simply absorb the various energies shot at him during a fight. He wonders if Kevin would ever grow those cool horn-things.

Still looking at the TV's blank screen, Ben finally works up the nerve to ask Kevin about at least some of the things he's wondering.

"What's it feel like?" His voice is soft, as if the tone could soften the offense he was half-sure Kevin would feel from the question.

There's no answer. After a few moments, Ben looks over to Kevin. He's still reading, and there's no indication he even heard the question. He repeats himself, a little louder this time, and still gets nothing. Ben frowns, then kicks the other teen in the knee, not bothering to hold back.

"GAHK!" The book drops from Kevin's hands and bounces off his lap onto the floor as Kevin jumps. He grabs his smarting knee with both hands, rubbing it gently as he allows his foot to fall to the floor. A second later, he whips his head around to glare at Ben angrily.

"-the hell was that for?"

"I needed to get your attention." Ben is not the least bit sorry.

"Then speak up!"

"I did."

"Then speak up louder!"

"Did that, too."

Scowling, Kevin returns his attention back to his aching knee.

Ben hesitates to ask. Maybe kicking him wasn't the best idea. He didn't seem to be in the mood for questions, especially ones he knew would likely bring up bad memories.

Kevin feels the heaviness of the silence, and glances at Ben out of the corner of his eye. Ben seems to have a dark, almost brooding expression, and Kevin realizes the other teen didn't kick him just for laughs. Well, the kicking part was probably funny to him, but whatever.

"Spit it out, Tennyson."

Startled out of his thoughts, Ben gives a highly intelligent "wha-?"

"I know you wanna say something, now say it."

"Uhhh…" Put on the spot, Ben freezes.

"What?"

Ben hesitates before starting: "umm, well, I was, uh, wondering, umm…"

Kevin is exasperated and impatient.

"Spit it out!"

Hesitates. "I was wondering…" And hesitates again.

"Yeah, I got that part."

Ben frowns at Kevin, then decides to just go with his original question.

"What's it feel like?"

"What's what feel like?"

Ben hesitates, yet again, and tries to think of how to put it. Kevin scowls. When he opens his mouth to tell him to _just say it already_, Ben decides to do just that.

"Energy. Absorbing it. What's it feel like?"

This time, Kevin hesitates, eyes wide, caught off guard. He wasn't expecting a question like that. He's not sure how to answer that, or even if he should. He thinks hard, slowly turning forward to face the blank TV. The silence is heavy, anticipating. A minute passes. Kevin, moving slowly, bends over and picks the manual off the floor. Automatically, he smooths out the ruffled and slightly bent pages before opening it and staring at them.

Putting the book in his lap, he starts leafing through the pages, looking for where he was before Ben decided their knee and foot should get to know each other. Once he finds it, his hands still and he leans back into the couch, posture relaxing, looking like he's going to just ignore the question and keep reading. Ben continues to stare at Kevin, still half-expecting an answer. After a minute or two, he grows frustrated and gets up from the couch, giving up on an answer and planning on just going to bed. Turning from the couch, he starts to remind Kevin to lock the front door behind him whenever he decides to leave when he's stopped by Kevin's answer:

"Pure power."

It was said softly, almost like he hoped Ben wouldn't be able to hear it. Pausing, Ben turned around and sat back on the couch, propping his legs on the middle cushion and motioning to Kevin to keep going.

"Pure power. But no control. But it doesn't matter, 'cause there's just so much power."

Ben isn't sure if he means control over the power or control over himself. Kevin isn't sure, himself.

"And once the rush fades, once you get used to the power flowing through your veins, you just wanna _do _something with it. To make something happen, 'cause you can, and you wonder how the hell you managed to survive without it. Without the power."

He picks up the pace, words stumbling over each other like they can't get out of his head fast enough.

"And then you go and you do something with it, and you use it up in seconds, 'cause the energy seems limitless, and so you use it all up at once. But then it's gone. There's no more left. And you panic 'cause the energy, the power is gone and you feel so week, so completely helpless without it. Useless. Unprotected. And it's terrifying, even though you've gone most of your life without the power, but you don't remember that 'cause you just went from invincible to nothing in three seconds flat. You're terrified, panicking, and you gotta get more, gotta protect yourself, 'cause you feel like the helplessness could kill you, like the powerlessness is swallowing you whole, and there's nothing but panic.

"So you go looking for more energy, and this time you absorb it on purpose."

It's at this point that Ben realizes Kevin's describing the first time he absorbed energy.

"And after the rush fades, you just stand there for a while before you realize you're standing _right next to an energy source_ and you can absorb _more_, and so you do it. And the power is so much more, the feeling is just… Then you go out and do something.

"You run out just as fast as the first time. And the panic is back. And then you absorb again, only more this time. Then you do something, and run out again. Then the panic returns. It always returns. So you do it again. And again.

"And it's… a horrible cycle. It's like… an addiction. A drug. You use, and it feels great, but once it fades, you feel like you could die. So you use again, 'cause you want to feel it again, and you don't want to feel _that_. And every time, it's just a little bit more, and the feeling when it fades gets worse and worse."

Kevin gives up with the book, and now just stares straight ahead, gaze blank.

"And the things I did with that power…" Kevin trails off, then starts again in second person.

"At first, its little things. 'Cause you're not the kind of person to hurt people. You shoot at cans, try to see if you can burn your name in the sidewalk, that sort of thing. Then, you start thinking: this kind of power could really hurt somebody. And it scares you. Of course, you don't realize that until it's already happened. You're… horrified. You try to stop, try to get rid of the power, but the emptiness…

"You swear you'll never do anything to hurt anybody in any way anymore. And for a while, you stick to it. Then you see the guy who was kicking you around last week leave his car unattended, and so you blow it up. Didn't mean to, but… And then the dude comes back, and you're still standing there, and he grabs you, and you shock him. You shock him good. And he runs. And before he runs, you see the fear in his eyes.

"And you realize… nobody's gonna push you around ever again."

**A/N: And there you go. This story actually kinda got away from me. I was intending it to be a one-shot, where Kevin explains what it feels like and Ben's like "wow, I didn't know that's what you go through" and that's it. But then Kevin went from just describing what it feels like to describing what his first time was like, and... yeah.**

**The first chapter isn't AU, but the rest will be. No, I'm not telling you how it goes. You'll just have to read on!**

**There shall be more to come! I already have most of the story up to the fourth chapter written down, so feel free to threaten me with pointy objects if I don't update within a day! Over the internet, though, not in real life.**


	2. Chapter 2

**A/N: This is the original second chapter. The third and fourth chapters tells my AU version of what happened during and after the ending of "Ultimate Power: Part 2". At first, I was going to switch around the second and third chapters so that the story would alternate between Kevin's story and the AU events, but now I'm starting to wonder if maybe I should make the AU events into a separate story. Neither storyline would change if they were made separate, but one of them might end up remaining incomplete, whereas if I keep the two together, the entire thing might never be completed. **

**The two storylines are separate, but the premise of Kevin's energy absorption being similar to drug use is the main focus of both of them. The AU storyline follows what I think should have really happened after Kevin was drained of all that energy. I mean, seriously, he goes insane, ends up hurting people he loves, then all of a sudden he's back to normal with no withdrawal symptoms or lingering psychological issues? Nope.**

**No matter what I decide on, I will do my best to finish it. I think I'll try a single story, because chapter 1 explains what Kevin goes through when he's drained of energy so well. **

**I just want to thank ****RenkonNairu**** for your lovely comment. 'Character study' isn't quite what I was going for, but I'll take it to mean that I managed to explore a side of Kevin that is rarely (if ever) shown in cannon while still somehow managing to keep him in-character. Thank yooouu~ X3**

**Warnings: Self-harming and mentions of drug use and suicide. Includes a few swear words, because Kevin is a potty-mouth.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own ****Ben**** 10:**** anything. Please don't sue me, I have no money.**

**EDITED: 2/26/15: Removed repeated and unneeded words and added a few.**

**Addiction**

_**Chapter Two**_

All throughout his 'tale of woe', Kevin remained seated, hunched forward with a grimace on his face, almost as though the story was physically hurting him.

"Slowly, the power changes the way you think, changes who you are. You remember that guy you…"

His eyes shut for a moment, before he takes a deep breath and continues.

"… and you don't remember someone who saw a beat-up kid sleeping in a doorway and probably woke him up to ask about his parents, or if he was alright. You remember some guy who dared to tap you on the shoulder, who was probably gonna mess with you. You don't feel sick that you…"

He pauses again.

"You feel… pleased that he'll never mess with you- or anyone else- ever again."

Ben realizes now that the guy Kevin mentioned earlier, the first one he accidentally used his powers on- he didn't just hurt him, he _killed _him. And based on how the story was going so far, and how old Kevin was when Ben first met him… Kevin was likely no more than nine or ten years old when this all happened.

To have killed someone at ten years old… Ben shudders. He was ten himself when he found the Omnitrix. If he had been any more careless with his powers, he likely could have found a fate similar to Kevin's.

"And pretty soon, you're doing it again, hunting down everyone who's ever wronged you and…"

He falls silent a few moments, hanging his head. His raven hair obscures his face, making it difficult to gauge his emotions.

"But you still aren't a bad person." The osmosian's voice takes on a pleading tone: "You reason that if those guys didn't think twice about hurting some little kid, what else would they be capable of? You tell yourself that the world is better off without them.

"Then, soon, everyone's fair game. Nobody's innocent, 'cause the Earth itself would hurt you if it had the chance. You don't care who you hurt. You're fucking GOD, and everyone else is beneath you! The normal people you pass on the street, the ones with good lives who see your ragged clothes and sneer, you shout at them in your head that it's only through your MERCY that they're still breathing!"

Kevin is practically shouting at this point, and his fists are clenched tight at his sides. Ben can't say anything even if he wants to. Kevin's… issues were a hell of a lot worse than he could have imagined. After a few moments, Kevin calms, and he continues in a softer tone:

"But you never actually hurt them. You rage in their head about how you could kill them all without breaking a sweat, that you should, but you never actually do anything.

"Until you meet this kid. At first, you only bother with him 'cause he's funny and you're bored. You show him a trick, but get careless and end up discharging the rest of your energy into the air as static. You still didn't have a lot of control over it. You're empty now, powerless, and the panic's back, but you manage to keep it from showing 'cause everyone's always looking for a chance to hurt you."

Ben has a sneaking suspicion.

"Then that gang of wanna-bes shows up and proves that everyone _is _out to get you. You try to play it cool, try to keep your face from showing the fear like you've been practicing, but it's threatening to take over. You think you're done for, and then this black-and-blue thing shows up outta nowhere and beats the crap outta them."

Suspicion confirmed.

"The kid says he's a friend of the speed dino, and you figure that if you hang out with him, the thing might show up again. You may be pretty insane, but you're still 11, so dinosaurs are cool."

"You thought XLR8 was a dinosaur?"

Kevin starts, remembering that Ben was sitting right next to him, listening to him explain just how messed up he was back then. Before Ben's comment brought him back to reality, he was just mindlessly recounting what happened, not really feeling anything about what he was saying. 'Emotional detachment,' Gwen would call it. A defense mechanism. It was like he was in some sort of trance.

Well, he wasn't now. He glares at the reason for that, who puts his arms up in surrender. After a moment, Kevin turns forward and tries to start again. Now, without a barrier keeping 'you' and himself separate, it was going to be difficult to get the words out.

He continues anyway.

"We…"

No, no, no! You are _not _talking about your screwed-up childhood, Kevin thinks to himself. You're just… telling a story. Yeah.

Barrier restored, he goes on.

"You hung out for a bit. Against your better judgment, you started kinda liking the kid. He was a little like you: a self-proclaimed 'tough guy' who didn't need anybody, took shit from no-one, and said what was on his mind without a care for what other people might think. He was like… a loner who couldn't get alone, and… I guess I felt for him."

Another slip, and the barrier shatters again. Kevin leans forward, laying his arms on his knees and starts fiddling with his hands. The 'story' was taking more out of him than he thought it would. A couple silent moments pass, and he steels himself to try again.

"You took him back to your place, but didn't stay long 'cause now you had a partner in crime. Two, if you counted the kid."

It takes a couple seconds for Ben to realize the insult, and he pouts.

"You got to the warehouse, got your hands on the prize, and then the cops showed up. It was a hell of a lot more than you were expecting, and you weren't at full power. They had helicopters. Freakin' helicopters! 'Oh no, the warehouse storing nothing more valuable or dangerous than violent video games has been broken into, let's get a fucking SWAT team to throw goddamn GAS CANS into the building!' Fucking lunatics."

Ben wants to point out that Kevin was probably a lot more insane than any of those people, but manages to hold himself back.

"You didn't want to scare the kid off, so instead of frying the fuzz, you just ran over them a little. Took a lot more energy to start up the forklift than if you'd just taken them out directly. Then, you're trapped, out of energy, and there's no way out, and just as you started wondering if finding a dead kid would distract them long enough for you to get away, the kid turned into some kind of giant bug!"

Ben almost shivers. That situation had already been pretty scary for him. He's glad he didn't know Kevin was thinking about killing him, or he might've wet himself.

"He got you both outta there, and the entire chase you were patting yourself on the back 'cause it turned out you made friends with someone almost as powerful as you. But as the minutes passed, your memory changed. Then your memory said that you made nice with him on purpose, 'cause you somehow _knew _he was powerful.

"Then the kid said something that _really _caught your attention: 'special energy.' You wanted that watch. When he said no, you were furious. You thought about stunning him with a blast to the head, then ripping his arm off to get the thing."

So. Ben almost died AND gotten his arm ripped off. Nice.

"But, again, you didn't have enough power for that. You still had to recharge after that forklift stunt. Once you did, you thought about wasting the kid, but… You had a plan, and you needed the speed dino to make it work.

"But the kid said no. Again. It was… baffling. I mean, you shook, you were partners! You felt betrayed. Suddenly, it was clear- this kid never wanted to be your friend! He made nice just so he could use you. Never mind that that's exactly what you thought you did with him…

"Now you _really_ wanted to kill him."

**Welp, that's it. **

**I apologize for any changes in tense in the story. I tried to keep it in present tense, 'cause that's how I started, but it's a lot harder than I thought it would be. I am not sorry about Kevin's speech changing from present to past tense because I can use the excuse of 'he just started talking that way.' However, I want him to stay in past tense, so if you notice any problems…**

**The next chapter will be up in anywhere from one to three days. If I decide to keep the two storylines in one story, expect it tomorrow. If not, it might take a while.**


	3. Chapter 3

**A/N: And here's where the AU starts. The stuff after the intro-thingy takes place during the end of "Absolute Power: Part 2" of season 1 of ****Ultimate Alien.**

**Yes, I've decided to go with the original plan of two storylines in one story. **

**Warnings: Self-harming and mentions of drug use and suicide. Includes a few swear words, because Kevin is a potty-mouth.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own ****Ben**** 10:**** anything. Please don't sue me, I have no money.**

**EDITED: 2/26/15: Added a line break.**

**Addiction**

_**Chapter Three**_

Ben was… uncomfortable. All he asked was how Kevin felt when he absorbed energy, but now Kevin was telling him his entire life story! And in second person, too, which was a little weird. Ben couldn't deny that what he was hearing was interesting, and it did answer more than a few questions he's always had, but he didn't ask for this much information! The answers were… unsettling.

But he couldn't ask Kevin to stop; couldn't walk away. Kevin was pouring his heart out, going through memories he would have likely rather forgotten, just to explain to Ben why he was the way he was. Why he was, in Kevin's words, 'seriously screwed in the head'.

And Kevin couldn't stop, even if he wanted to. A weight that had been crushing him for years was finally being lifted from his chest. He was coming clean, and in Kevin's mind, Ben deserved to know why he did the things he did. Ben couldn't refuse to listen, he just couldn't. Kevin owed it to Ben to explain why he's tried to kill him over the years, and why he did what he did a couple of months ago and why it took a couple months for him to recover from it.

~(-_-)~(0_0)~(x_x)~

About four months ago, Ben and Co. lured Kevin to the abandoned military base to attempt to cure him of his physical and mental… issues. Once Ben, as Ultimate Echo Echo, took him out and placed him in the restraints, Cooper turned on the machine, hopefully starting Kevin's transformation back into his old self. As the light show started, Kevin began howling in pain as the alien energies were forcefully ripped from his body.

The process took a little over five minutes, with Kevin's screams becoming more human about halfway through as the sonorosian energy left his vocal chords. Limbs and spikes slowly retracted into his body; dark colors faded into flesh tones. Fur and scales disappeared as human skin took its place. And throughout it all, the shifting form remained rigid as agonized screams fled its chest.

Once his real arms and legs had shrunk enough, the energy field was the only thing keeping Kevin in place. After about thirty seconds of that, the machine shut off. Freed from the pain, screams were abruptly cut off, and Kevin flopped limply to the floor, unconscious. Once Michael was dealt with, everyone turned their attention to Kevin. Gwen was sitting criss-cross on the floor with his head in her lap, her hands glowing pink at his temples.

After a few moments, Kevin groaned, coming to. His eyes opened slowly, but they were blank, unseeing. Shutting them tight, he moaned again, body aching from the arduous procedure. He blinked rapidly, finally waking enough to notice his surroundings.

Everyone but Darkstar (tied in a corner) held their breath as they walked closer, hoping for the best yet fearing the worst.

Suddenly, Kevin's eyes opened wide, his breath quick and shallow. He squeezed them shut once more, before he started mumbling something under his breath.

"No, no, no, no, no, no, no…"

Fists clenched and unclenched at his sides. His muscles were tense as springs under quickly perspiring skin. He was shaking like a leaf. Gwen's brows furrowed, the mana at her hands growing brighter. When she whipped her head up to glare at the people crowding around, everyone stepped back nervously. Nobody knew what was going on, save perhaps Gwen, and none were willing to break the tense silence as she returned her concentration to her boyfriend.

Without warning, Kevin's fists opened and his fingertips slammed into the floor. Concrete flowed over his body as he absorbed the material. Nobody knew what to make of any of it, except that it seemed the osmosian was having some sort of breakdown.

A minute of frozen agitation passed before Kevin's eyes opened. He lunged to his feet as though shot from a cannon, heading straight for an electrical socket on one of the brick walls. Nobody made a move to stop him, caught by surprise at his sudden movement. Nobody but Gwen.

A whispered 'somnus,' and Kevin fell, a mere foot from his target, stone draining from his body. Gwen calmly walked over to the now-sleeping teen and gathered him in her arms on the floor, hugging him tightly. Everyone else looked away from the sight, ashamed that they had failed to react.

"Cooper?"

The technopath started lightly.

"Could you…?" She tried to hold Kevin higher off the floor, struggling with his weight.

Rushing over, Cooper gently picked Kevin up and waited. Gwen whispered something to Max and Julie, who both nodded and left the building with Gwen. Cooper followed after them.

Outside, at a word from Julie, Ship melted from the battlesuit form into his natural shape, before bounding a few feet away from the group and transforming into a spaceship. Cooper entered the vehicle, strapping Kevin into a chair before getting off. Julie didn't even bother getting on, instead wishing Max and Gwen luck as the two boarded. Once they were on, the loading bay closed, and Ship took off, leaving Ben wondering what the hell he was going to do with Darkstar.

**A/N: There it is. Next chapter will continue with this storyline, and will hopefully be up before 6 PM tomorrow. **


	4. Chapter 4

**A/N: And here's the fourth chapter. This one continues with the second storyline, started in the third chapter. I've decided to have the first storyline continue in third person omniscient, with the second being third person limited, switching between Ben, Gwen and Kevin. I am also done with present tense. I may eventually rewrite the first two chapters in past tense.**

**To the absolutely wonderful RenkonNairu: I am thoroughly thrilled that you are enjoying the direction this story decided to scamper in. Despite the fact you seem to be the only one who likes this fic, I shall continue. I know how frustrating it is to find a story that intrigues and excites you only to never see it finished. I officially dedicate this fic to you, who reviewed within hours of me posting the first chapter, thus assuring me that someone other than myself could be interested in this story. Thank you! And as far as Gwen being 'on the ball,' well, there's a very good reason for that, though it likely won't be revealed for at least a couple more chapters.**

**Warnings: Self-harming and mentions of drug use and suicide. Includes a few swear words, because Kevin is a potty-mouth.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own ****Ben**** 10:**** anything. Please don't sue me, I have no money.**

**EDITED: 2/26/15: Changed "nerves" to "courage", "and" to "until", added a sentence, changed the wording of another sentence and changed "shivers" to "shivered".**

**Addiction**

_**Chapter Four**_

A week after Gwen and Max took Kevin off to somewhere, Ben finally gathered the courage to ask his cousin where that 'somewhere' was. She didn't respond directly, instead calling their grandfather and having him drive them to the Plumber's Earth headquarters. The ride was quiet, Ben imagining reasons for why Kevin would've been taken there, as well as why he would have stayed for so long. The imagined scenarios increased in in severity and decreased in likelihood the longer the ride went on, until he eventually gave up.

Once they arrived at the underground facility, Ben nervously followed his relatives as they walked to the Medical Wing. The hallways turned and twisted, each one seeming to have at least five more halls branching off of it. Or was it branching off of them? There were very little signs giving location or direction, yet the leading Tennysons walked with purpose, certain in their route. Ben mused that they had likely gone this way dozens of times in the past week. He himself wasn't sure he'd be able to find the way out even with the aid of a map.

After what seemed to the young hero like hours of walking, Max and Gwen paused before a door. A quick wave of the retired Plumber's badge at the security panel by the doorframe swung the door open outwards, and Max waved the two inside before entering himself and closing the door behind him.

The space looked to be some sort of security room, though it didn't seem like there was a guard on duty. The wall opposite the door was nearly covered by an enormous screen, with a small console and desk chair in front of it. The display was broken down into numerous smaller frames, each one showing a different room. The rooms themselves appeared identical: dull gray walls surrounding eggshell-colored tile floors, a single metal cot, a single metal door, toilet and sink. Some rooms were occupied by single individuals, while others showed two or more beings interacting with each other. About half the rooms appeared vacant.

They were cells, yes, but not for prisoners. This was a mental ward. A few of the more frightening scenarios he imagined on the ride came to Ben's mind, and he couldn't help a shiver ghosting down his spine.

None of the patients seemed to be in particularly bad shape, though. None were tied down, had IVs, or were drawing patterns in blood on the floor. That, coupled with the lack of someone actively monitoring the cells at all times, helped to ease Ben's mind somewhat. These people were all likely 'mentally unstable,' at least enough to warrant separation from the general public, but not to the extent that they were a danger to themselves or needed constant medication. Not well, but not as bad as they could be. And if the Tennysons were at this particular monitoring station, the description probably applied to Kevin as well.

Not good, but not _too _bad. Not as bad as it could be. Ben supposed that although the situation was a bit worse than the first few his mind came up with, he was fine with accepting it.

His eyes roamed across the screen, scanning for one particular person, studying each being. He dismissed a few out of hand, as they were obviously not human. About halfway through his search, he realized the error in that logic. Kevin had been returned to normal the last time he saw him, but what if the 'cure' wasn't permanent? Yes, the machine had supposedly stripped him completely of the alien energies, but what if it had missed something? What if Kevin had been awake when he was brought to the base, and managed to drain the energy from someone while they were trying to help him?

His sudden fears were calmed when, at a few inputs from Max, a single frame on the monitor was selected and enlarged in the center. The image duplicated three times, each copy showing the view in some other form of vision. Ben definitely recognized one as being infrared. Text filled the rest of the screen, in a language Ben couldn't identify, much less read. Gwen seemed to be able though, as she instantly zeroed in on a block of text and walked over to one side of the room to see it better.

Based on hair and skin tone, the figure shown in the room could be Kevin, but…

He was huddled in one corner, legs held to his bare chest. The torn jeans Kevin wore on his rampage were still on him, and he seemed to be wearing some sort of silvery gloves. His head was down, obscuring his face. What looked to be a change of clothes, in the blindingly white style the place seemed to favor, was sitting on the cot, untouched. A tray of food was on the floor by the door, similarly ignored. Ben had a sinking suspicion that the osmosian hadn't eaten since he got there. Every once in a while, Kevin shivered, holding himself tighter.

Whatever Gwen had read didn't seem to reassure her. She turned to their grandfather, holding out her hand.

"I'm going to see if…" She trailed off. Max nodded, handing over his badge, and Gwen left the room.

Once the door shut, Ben turned to his grandfather, silently asking for information.

"He's mostly gotten over the panic," he started, "but he still has a long way to go before he's fully recovered."

Ben nodded, not sure what to feel about the situation. "And the gloves?"

"To prevent him from absorbing anything."

Before he could ask more, a soft knock sounded from the room's speakers.

"Kevin? It's me, Gwen. I'm coming in."

The figure in the cell didn't react.

After a moment's pause, Gwen entered the room and quietly closed the door behind her. She didn't move for a second, and her posture screamed of uncertainty. She took a hesitant step forward, but at the lack of reaction from the huddled osmosian, she crossed the distance between them in slow, quiet strides. Once she got within two feet of him, she sat on the floor with her legs folded beneath her, hands grasping each other in her lap. She waited for some sort of reaction, but getting none, she began to talk.

"Kevin? It's Gwen."

Nothing. She sighed.

"You really should eat something. Starving yourself isn't helping anyone, least of all yourself."

More nothing, and another sigh.

"I want you to know that I'm here for you, Kevin. I want to help you, alright?"

A whole lot of nothing.

"Whenever you're ready, Kevin, alright? Whenever you're ready, I'll be right here to help you. You don't have to go through this alone. I won't let you go through it alone, okay? I'm here for you."

Silence.

Gwen stood up, arms wrapped tightly around her. "You'll get through this. _We'll _get through this. It'll be alright, I promise."

Still nothing, and Gwen turned, leaving the room without a second glance.

**A/N: And there it is. Next chapter will continue with the first storyline, and will be up within a week. I already had the first four written before I posted, but now I have to start writing again, so I won't be able to put something new up every day like I've been doing. If you feel that my updates are too few and far between, feel free to threaten me with pointy objects. Over the internet, though, not in person.**


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Fifth chapter! This one continues with the first storyline. I've decided to not use the format of 'Kevin telling a story', 'cause I've gotten sick of the excessive dialogue and writing Kevin and Ben's reactions. Instead, I'm just gonna write the story out as the main focus, in past tense with Kevin's first person POV, inserting Ben's significant reactions as a separate thingy. You'll see what I mean.**

**To the fabulous ****Humas and Peeta: ****Glad you like! When I got your review and favorite and follow, I bounced around in joy like an idiot for an hour. And thank you for being the first to favorite this… thingy. Have a claymore! *Hands you a suspiciously red-labeled giant sword before running like hell***

**Warnings: Self-harming and mentions of drug use and suicide. Includes a few swear words, because Kevin is a potty-mouth.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own ****Ben 10:**** anything. Please don't sue me, I have no money.**

**Addiction**

_**Chapter Five**_

_Previously in the first storyline:_

"But the kid said no. Again. It was… baffling. I mean, you shook, you were partners! You felt betrayed. Suddenly, it was clear- this kid never wanted to be your friend! He made nice just so he could use you. Never mind that that's exactly what you thought you did with him…

"Now you _really _wanted to kill him."

~(-_-)~(0_0)~(x_x)~

After probably insulting me (I couldn't really understand his muttering), the kid stalked towards the track's controls. The damn brat tricked me, betrayed me, (probably) insulted me, then tried to stop me? No way I was gonna let that slide. When he tried to get past me, I grabbed him by the shoulders and swung him around, throwing him a good six feet into the side of the platform. When he picked himself off the ground, glaring at me, I was about halfway down a shortcut to 'pissed' and starting to see red.

I tried to scare the kid off, 'cause, seriously? I'd seen him in action and… I hated to admit it, even to myself, but… he was kinda powerful. I was confident I could take out the giant bug and pretty sure an electric field would be able to stop the speed dino, but he supposedly had eight other things he could turn into. I had no idea what those eight were, and thus no way of knowing if I could take them on. I was reasonably powered up and feeling pretty invincible, but I didn't wanna start a fight only to have him turn into some sort of insulated rubber monster.

I might've been pretty stupid and insane back then, but not _that _much.

I let the electricity in my body surge around my arm, and it the crackling sound it gave off was almost menacing.

"Oh, you do _not _wanna make me mad!" I forced a threatening grin to my face, hiding my apprehension.

"Me neither."

My stomach dropped, and the panic took its place. At that point in my life, it was always there, no matter how much energy I absorbed. I only ever managed to push it back, to bury it under something else, and it always showed up whenever I lost control of a situation. The only thing that could shove it to the back of my mind for more than a few minutes was the power, and even then it always came back. To make it worse, my failed attempt to scare the kid off had drained me down to less than half power.

I thought about running away, but the universe hated me back then.

"I'm switching the track back!" He started fiddling with his watch.

The shortcut skipped right over 'pissed' and stopped at 'I'm gonna rip your arms off and beat you with them before tearing off your nose and forcing you to eat it.' The kid had some nerve, defying me! He would pay for his gall; how dare he even _think _about challenging me!

Yeah, I was in 'God Mode'. Illusions of omnipotence and all that.

The kid slammed his hand onto his wrist, and rocks flowed over his body. He grew taller, his head caught on fire, and I could feel the heat from where I was standing. It was an impressive sight, and the panic started pushing its way forward.

"Aw, stupid watch."

He looked disappointed, like he meant to do something else. Maybe he turned into the wrong thing? If so, then maybe what he turned into wasn't a good match against me, which could only be a good thing. I supposed I had a chance after all, and the thought that I might win put a smirk on my face.

He thrust one arm towards me, hand glowing brighter.

"Move back!" His voice was different, deeper and somewhat gravelly.

"Or what, you're gonna burn my dinner?"

Lame, I know, but give me a break. I was eleven.

"Fight me, you're the one who's gonna be burned!"

Of course, I took that as a challenge. I ran back to the tracks' control box and started sucking up more energy than I think I ever had before. Don't know why he didn't fry me before I powered up. Didn't really care back then. The rush of electricity caused all the lights in the area to blow, and soon the only light came from the kid's head.

He didn't seem to know what to do. After looking around for a moment, he gave up and just stood there. Again, don't know why, and didn't really care. It just made it easier to sneak up on him, which I did. I tried to tackle him to the floor, but he was sturdier than he seemed. We struggled for a while, until I got the bright idea to try absorbing some of that 'special energy' he was talking about earlier. It didn't go too well.

First of all, it _hurt._ With electricity, the right amount would be able to fry any normal human from the inside out. Since I was able to absorb it, electricity didn't hurt me. What I felt, absorbing from the Omnitrix, was similar to what I imagined being electrocuted would feel like. It burned from within, and flowed into me everywhere at once and didn't stop until I was flung to the side, hitting the platform much like the kid had hit it earlier.

I think I blacked out for a moment, 'cause everything went dark. When I could see again, I saw the kid rushing towards me, and reacted instinctively, shooting a blast of electricity at him. 'Cept the color was all wrong, and an explosion sent him flying in a way electricity doesn't do.

'Cause it wasn't electricity. Half of me was a miniature version of the hothead, and the energy flowing through me felt different than anything I'd ever felt before. It felt… awesome. The rush I felt then was just as strong as when I first absorbed, and I couldn't sense the panic anymore. It was just… gone, and in its place was a feeling that I'd finally achieved a level of power I'd been searching for my entire life.

The urge to use this newfound power was stronger than ever, and I felt my mouth curve in a triumphant smile once I realized I had the perfect target standing right in front of me.

~(-_-)~(0_0)~(x_x)~

**A/N: And that's it. Next chapter will continue where this left off, and will be posted within a week. I think I've found a style I'm comfortable with, so I'll probably stick with it. I'm not sure how long I'll be writing about this one episode (****Ben 10; ****"Kevin 11"), but it will be finished either next chapter or the one after that. Once it's done, I'll write about the time between the end of that episode and his next appearance (****Ben 10; ****"Framed"), then that episode, and so on until I reach the beginning of ****Ben 10: Alien Force.**

**Until then, I bid you farewell.**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: Sixth chapter! Yaaaay. **

**To ****Humus and Peeta****: D'aww, thanks! I guess we're both happy fools, then! **

**To ****binso****: Thanks! I'm glad that more people think Kevin was a bit too… recovered, I guess you could call it, from being a supposed insane, violent sociopath in ****Alien Force ****and ****Ultimate Alien****. And I'm glad you like the story!**

**Thanks to ****EvilQueen5,****temple of the chaos raven****, ****Letheanlove**** and ****binso ****for the follows and favorites! Have a sweetroll! *hands you a red-labeled pastry before running off***

**Warnings: Self-harming and mentions of drug use and suicide. Includes a few swear words, because Kevin is a potty-mouth.**

**Disclaimer: I do not own ****Ben 10:**** anything. Please don't sue me, I have no money.**

**Addiction**

_**Chapter Six**_

I felt… weird. My head was on fire and my left arm and half of my chest were numb with a warmth I could sense emanating from my core. My vision was also different, darker yet warmer, and I could hear a dull roar I soon realized was _fire_ flooding through the veins of my modified body. The still-human parts of my body seemed overly hot and highly sensitive compared to the rough skin of the pyronite sections.

The power was still there, but it was different. It was loud, and consumed all non-relevant thoughts, until all I could think was _'powerful_' and _'fight'_, _'burn' _and _'hurt'_, _'more' _and _'kill'_. The mindset of a pyronite, etched in the DNA I had absorbed, started to overwhelm my own, and I fought it. It was hard, but I fought it with all I had. Yet it wasn't enough; I couldn't push those thoughts from my head, no matter how hard I tried.

I settled on a compromise, shoving those impulses to the back of my head where the panic once lived, and focused instead on how badly I was going to destroy the kid. I focused on how I would laugh as I burned him alive, then dance as I set his ashes on fire. Now that I know more about pyronite psychology, I understand that I wasn't as successful at ignoring those thoughts as I thought I was back then.

When he got up, the kid seemed to be surprised by my new look. I remember thinking his head would explode if he tried any harder to figure out what happened. I decided to help him out, "I absorb energy, remember?"

"You don't have to do this." I wasn't sure what he was referring to. I didn't have to do what, copy his power? Kill innocent people for a payday? Be a violently insane sociopath? Absorb energy? Fight him? Despite my confusion, I still took offense to him telling me what I did and didn't have to do. All his words did was add fuel to the raging inferno I could already feel inside me.

He lunged at me, and I stepped to the side before blasting him in the back. The spray of flames I shot from my hand was much wider than it had to be- I had no more control over this new power than I did over the old ones. Surprisingly, the fire seemed to actually hurt the kid. I thought a being made of fire would have some sort of immunity to it, but…

He fell to his hands and knees, and I stalked towards him, ready to finish it. I was sick and tired of always getting pushed around, by both other people and the things that happened to me. I had had enough of everyone looking down on me. "It's time I got what's coming to me. Nobody's calling me 'freak' anymore!"

I was going to end it. I was going to end _him. _Yeah, we were friends for a good couple of hours, but he betrayed me, and I wasn't pissed. I was way past pissed, I was fucking _homicidal,_ and he was going to pay for crossing me.

Actually, at that point, I was having trouble remembering exactly what he did to make me mad. It didn't matter though; I wanted to kill him, so I was going to kill him. It was just that simple. I was in a state of single-mindedness that would make a hungry gourmand proud, and the only thing that was running through my mind was just how _dead _the kid would be when I was done with him.

Then a loud horn pierced through my thoughts, and I remembered what I was doing in a subway tunnel in the first place. A second whistle sounded, and I smiled at the kid's apparent panic.

"Payday."

The conductors on the trains seemed to realize they were on a collision course. Although, now that I think about it, it could just be that they saw a rock-man with a fiery head sitting on the tracks. Whatever; either way, they were both frantically sounding the whistles of their respective trains, as if doing so would magically keep them from colliding.

I was so happy: finally, something was going my way! Despite the bump in my plan, I was going to get what I wanted. I didn't think about the hundreds of people that were going to die, I didn't think about what the kid was going to do once the trains crashed, I just thought about how I was going to be rich. After all the shit the universe dumped on me, I was finally getting what I deserved. I sprinted to the side, hopped on the platform and sat on the edge. I wanted to watch from the best seat in the house as everything came together.

And I watched from this perfect position as the kid completely ruined my plans. In any other situation, melting the control box would've done nothing more than destroy the only chance to switch the tracks back. In my world, it turned out to be another way to save the day. The tracks switched, and the passenger train followed them safely out of the way. I was devastated. The universe didn't even give me the satisfaction of watching the other train run the kid over. Instead, he disappeared in a swirling firestorm, and the train passed through the station uneventfully.

How disappointing. I jumped from the platform to the tracks, trying to see where the kid went. Surprisingly, I didn't want to kill him anymore. Most of the anger I felt only moments ago had cooled, leaving bitter disappointment in its place. I think I wanted to apologize to him, try to go back to being friends again.

Then I remembered why I was so mad with him in the first place, and the rage returned. It wasn't the same all-consuming fury it was earlier, though. I didn't want to kill him anymore, I just wanted to rip out his spine and shove it down his throat.

_("I'm not a doctor, but I'm pretty sure that would've killed me."_

_ "Shut up, Tennyson.")_

I couldn't find him, though. I was sore about him ruining my chance to get rich quick, but I couldn't beat him up if he wasn't there anymore. "Forget the money." I could get money whenever I wanted to. But I knew this new power wouldn't last, and I knew the perfect way to put it to good use.

"Time to get some priceless revenge."

**A/N: Ta-da! I am quite proud of myself. **

**Just to clear some things up: 'pyronite' is Heatblast's species, and 'gourmand' is Upchuck's species. **

**Next chapter will return to the second storyline, and will be posted before 6:00 PM next Thursday. Until then, farewell! **

***hops on an evil-looking black horse and rides off into a swirling portal in the mouth of a giant stone face***


End file.
